nineteen years young
studying for a psych major
possible crim minor
I don’t mind clingy. In fact, I appreciate it more. When you constantly tell me you miss me, or get worried when I don’t respond quickly. Because it shows that you actually care about me, and if I truly like you, nothing you do will ever annoy me.
I read this and thought ‘wow that’s nice, I should reblog it’.
Then I stopped, and I read it again. Word by word, thinking hard about how I can actually apply this to my life. I’ve read it about 50 times now and I still can’t get it out of my head; what if we all did this? What if we forgot about fights, sadness, arguments, anger, and embarrassment? What if we lived for the small things and forgot about everything else?
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying we should ignore important things in life or live with ‘no regrets’. All I’m saying is that it really is true; at the end of the day, all that we should really be thinking about is the little things that made us happy, even if it was for a mere second.
i just realized that i haven’t blogged anymore because of the very fact that i have so much held inside of me. i can’t just pinpoint one thing to vent about. everything has something in itself. before, if something bothered me, i’d just put it all into words as soon as i could. now, i just try to distract myself from what i’m feeling but i know, always in the back of my mind or at the end of the night, my mind wanders. jumping from one thing to the next. & i can’t find a solution. so what’s there left to do? take it a day at a time. but where does that even lead me to? i don’t feel like i’m getting any better. i’m just getting more lost. more confused. more conflicted.
Listen to the WORLDWIDE PREMIERE of ‘Come & Get It’! It will be available TONIGHT on iTunes at 12AM EST/ 9:00 PM PST.
i was finally given a shot at happiness for a very short time and it was marvelous when i experienced it. but out of nowhere, everything got destroyed and the puzzle pieces of my life were scattered in the process. i’m so lost. confused. tired. & i just feel like everything is just getting worse. i don’t feel like i belong anywhere anymore. & i just feel like everyone is passing me by. the realization hit me when the phrase “feeling alone in a crowded room” became so intensely true i wanted to cry right then in there. & as i write this, i’m holding back the tears. i just want everything to be good again. just for once, i want to actually live and not survive.